What is something you can do that was hard to learn?
I took a lot of lessons when young and also tackled certain obligatory skills like riding a bike, playing chess and knowing the difference between a weed and an expensive flowering plant. Some of the things I learned were really difficult for me. I eventually mastered bike riding, but not without a series of dramatic encounters with the pavement. I can use a sewing machine for basic hemming and stitching. And I could probably get up on board and ride a horse if I happen to come across one that needs a rider.
But I can’t play bridge, despite numerous lessons. I can’t sail a boat and I can’t dance.
I think the hardest thing I ever learned is how to stop talking and actively listen.
When I was young, I think I talked too much. I prattled away endlessly, even if no one was listening to me. I don’t think I had anything very interesting to say, quite frankly. As I got older, I may have had more knowledge about various topics, but I don’t think I balanced the art of listening with the skill of conversation quite correctly.
As an adult, I began to appreciate my friends who are good listeners and I began to really value their reactions to others who went way overboard with their endless blabbering. I made a conscious choice that I was going to be a better listener.
It took time. I was used to talking a lot. But soon my new skills as a listener became easier and I was able to balance healthy conversation with focused listening. It allowed me to deepen my friendships and appreciate people in new ways. The quieter friends, who before had been a good audience for my silly observations, became more open and honest themselves as I quieted myself down. The louder, more vocal friends found a new listener, and they became more open, too. Our friendships became more meaningful. And the content of our conversations became much more interesting. I learned that the best conversations do not begin with talking but with listening.
Now, I see myself as a listener more than a talker. It was not easy for me, but I like this attribute. I am glad I learned it. Maybe some day I will finally learn how to play bridge.
What is something you can do that was hard to learn?
